Friday, April 20, 2007
I'm really funny today!
You know how some days you really feel dumb, and other days you feel really funny? Today I'm really funny! Example: You know how I really don't like cursing, right? I don't mind if other people say curse words—it just makes me feel uncomfortable when I do it. Like, instead of the "s" word, I'll say "sugar," or instead of the "f" word, I'll say "fuddy-dud," or instead of the "c" word, I'll say "cungerella." That kind of thing. So I was talking to my friend Trudy—the bank teller— on the phone today, and once again she was complaining about her job, and how the managers never treat her right. "The bosses always interrupt my lunch break," she says, or "they always make sexual remarks about my nude pantyhose," or "when I work the drive-thru teller window the microphone smells like feet." Anyway, after listening to her complain for 20 minutes, she finally ends her rant by saying, "Seriously! It's as if all that bank cares about is money!"
And I'm all like—get this— "No 's', Herlock."
SEE?? See what I did there? Instead of saying "No [blank], Sherlock," I just took the "s" off the front end of "Sherlock," and since I was talking to a girl, it became "Herlock"! No "S", Herlock! ISN'T THAT FUNNY?
I thought it was hilarious! In fact, I was laughing so hard at my joke, I couldn't hear anything Trudy was saying to me, so she hung up. HA! I'm laughing about it now! I tell you, I'm regular Wayland Flowers and Madame!
I'm thinking about buying a cowboy hat. Will that make me look stupid?