Thursday, April 19, 2007

I just found a box of cassettes from the '80s.

Hello. How are you? I'm excited! I woke up this morning determined to Spring clean my house, but guess what I found when I was emptying out my closet?
A shoebox filled with old mixtape cassettes from the '80s! Talk about bringing back memories. Weirdly enough, I was really into goth stuff back then. There's a lot of Ministry here, along with Bauhaus, The Cure, and The Smiths. I don't really remember dressing differently though. I do remember jogging around the park with my walkman, and singing, "EVERYDAY IS HALLOWEEN!" Ha. Good times.
Ooh! And here's
a Rick Springfield tape! "Oh, I wish I had JESSIE'S GIRRRL…yeah, I wish that I had JESSIE'S GIRRRL! Where can I find a woman like THAT!"
And look!
A "Dead or Alive" tape! "You spin me right round baby right round, like a record baby round, round, round, ROUND!" Man, I remember this crazy party where Debbie Fortenberry and I danced to this song, and then made out in the bathroom. But then that jerk Tommy Anderson got super drunk and threw the air conditioner out the window, which hit a car, and the cops came in and busted up the party.
And what's this?
Stryper's Greatest Hits? Sah-weet! Hey, did you know they were a Christian metal band? I didn't! I listened to this tape for years without the slightest idea. Kind of ruined it for me actually. I don't like Christian music, because ONCE AGAIN, they refuse to ask me for my opinion. It makes me feel weird when people I don't even know are telling me how much they love me. I wish Avril Lavigne would write a song about me. She'd "keep it real" I bet.
I had some soy sausage for breakfast this morning? IT STUNK.


Ja'AmLo said...

I KNEW you were a goth!

Since you don't like Christian rock, it must really piss you off seeing crosses everyhwere! I mean, if i was nailed to a darn cross, that would totally be the last thing i'd ever want to see again! How do you cope?

PS i totally burned the roof of my mouth on a microwaved burrito today.

Kato said...

Disintegration is the greatest album of all time.

Maggie said...

Did you get busted by the cops? And, if so, got a mug shot?

Cee in SF said...

I love a diety that gets down to Rick Springfield.

Jesus H. Christ said...

Hey Ja'amio.
Thanks for that comment you made. Crosses are kind of a bummer. It's like they're rubbing my face in it! Sorry about your burrito. I have a canker sore if that makes you feel any better.
Bye now.

Dear Kato.
Bye now.

Dear Maggie.
It's nice that you commented. I have no idea what you're talking about.
Bye now.

Hello Cee in SF.
Your comment is appreciated. Rick Springfield makes my body rock.
Bye now.

Eahn said...

so this one time i was reading "the book"you know, "of love" and then i thought to myself, why not replace sunshine with a FISH hahahahahha!

natalie said...

you have great taste in music, Jesus.