tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post6950251124071718846..comments2023-10-25T01:55:03.860-07:00Comments on Jesus Christ's Blog: I went to Trudy's house.Jesus H. Christhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16650554157416791162noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-34043037530592572392007-06-14T13:54:00.000-07:002007-06-14T13:54:00.000-07:00beagal... dude... that was AWESOME!beagal... dude... that was AWESOME!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06683649076722442176noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-39756536678422330182007-06-13T17:03:00.000-07:002007-06-13T17:03:00.000-07:00Poor me.1) Oooh, I like the mix tape idea. I gotta...Poor me.<BR/><BR/>1) Oooh, I like the mix tape idea. I gotta dig up some Phil Collins.<BR/>2) Like-like is dangerous. You're right-right.<BR/>3) Oooh, I like snow cones!<BR/>4) I think I'm more of a Paul than a Kevin.<BR/>5) I never got that phrase "biblical sense." It's not very sexy.<BR/>6) Don't worry, I'm usually blogging on the wrong day.<BR/>7) Banana.<BR/>8) Was the package a burrito?<BR/>9) Response deleted.<BR/>10) Savage gets a little freaked out by me, actually. His Catholic upbringing and all.<BR/>11) I can't get the time machine to work, because whenever I go to the past, the time machine hasn't been invented yet!<BR/>12) I heard that Winnie Cooper is now some kind of hot math whiz.<BR/>13) Well, I was so mean to Trudy, I wouldn't blame her for a little effing. (PMF!)<BR/>14) Hurrah! Or rather, Hurra!<BR/>15) Karen would look great as a ninja! (The real kind, not the… you know what I mean.)<BR/>16) Who keeps telling you I'm a Buddhist? I don't even KNOW the guy!<BR/>17) EXACTLY.<BR/>18) Ooh, a "shepardess." That sounds hot.<BR/>19) "Biting the wall." That's funny!<BR/>20) DEAD.<BR/>21) Trudy is kind of beautiful.<BR/>22) From CNN.com: "Nancy Grace hosts Headline News' legal analysis program."<BR/>23) The handle on Trudy's door fell off. Vampires scare me.<BR/>24) For hopefully the last time, MY MOTHER IS D-E-A-D! (And she'll be dead the next time someone asks, too.)<BR/>25) WOW! You're a regular Kid Rock!<BR/>26) Yeah… her hair is freaky…<BR/>27) Okay, no Phil Collins. How about Lionel Richie?Jesus H. Christhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16650554157416791162noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-13352572036352756182007-06-13T14:31:00.000-07:002007-06-13T14:31:00.000-07:00hi jesus,so does this mean you like-like trudy?per...hi jesus,<BR/><BR/>so does this mean you like-like trudy?<BR/><BR/>personally i think she's just making you sweat. a girl's gotta do that from time to time, to make sure her boy learns his lesson for real and doesn't think that just a simple apology will get him off the hook every time.<BR/><BR/>she doesn't even like damien - she's using him to get under your skin, and it's working.<BR/><BR/>so just hang tight there - don't go making her mixed tapes because although that's sweet, it screams pathetic. but don't totally blow her off either. just be cool.<BR/><BR/>love,<BR/>lynnaeUnknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06683649076722442176noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-57518832049449949372007-06-13T14:27:00.000-07:002007-06-13T14:27:00.000-07:00Wow!!!Begal has him/her some skills!!!Try that Jes...Wow!!!<BR/>Begal has him/her some skills!!!<BR/>Try that Jesus. I still stand by my seconding the advice given that you should date Nancy Grace, if for no other reason than to find out the secret of her hair.<BR/>Tell Karen we said hi. Enjoy your package!!!! Burrito's da man.minniemama68https://www.blogger.com/profile/01400210964965229219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-42509744176388039332007-06-13T13:44:00.000-07:002007-06-13T13:44:00.000-07:00my ninja,you gotta go back and read your own blog ...my ninja,<BR/><BR/>you gotta go back and read your own blog and learn from it!<BR/><BR/>what you need to do is write her a rap song, big willie style, and get jiggy with it yo!<BR/><BR/>here's a start for you:<BR/><BR/>trudy, you're the one i like-likes<BR/>it's with you i want to ride bike-bikes<BR/>up and down the road to the 7-eleven,<BR/>stick with me girl, and you're a shoe in to heaven.<BR/>now i'm here to tell you, although you're the bank tell-ah<BR/>you're booty makes me want to be you're only fell-ah.<BR/><BR/>peas shout!Beagalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06273699010013393377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-38461627719022924352007-06-13T12:36:00.000-07:002007-06-13T12:36:00.000-07:00In my opinion, Karen is a WAY better friend than T...In my opinion, Karen is a WAY better friend than Trudy. However, if Trudy is your lobster, you need to try and get her to be your girlfriend. A mix tape is a good start, also being nice and friendly and NOT yelling at her. <BR/><BR/>Don't ask Dan Savage for advice, he will just say DTMFA (PMF). Ask your mom! You have a mom, right? If not, my boyfriend's mom is super good at advice, and she REALLY believes in you A LOT. I could ask her for you. <BR/><BR/>I hope you feel better soon. In the immortal words of the J. Geils Band... Love Stinks.KellyChristinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14858717744361033388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-65426898171960883742007-06-13T11:33:00.000-07:002007-06-13T11:33:00.000-07:00Hi again Jesus!I know this has nothing to do with ...Hi again Jesus!<BR/>I know this has nothing to do with your current situation, but:<BR/>See that picture you put on this post?<BR/>I know you don't like the artists who paint you BUT --- did you know that the picture shows you knocking on a door but there's no HANDLE on your side? That's supposedly because whoever is INSIDE has to hear you knocking and THEY have to invite you in. It's a metaphor for the person inviting you into their HEART. You know, like "Jesus can't just brute-force his way into your life, YOU have to let him in."<BR/>Did you know that?<BR/>I just thought it was kind of interesting.<BR/>It's also kind of like how a vampire can't just brute-force his way into your house, you have to invite him. (Not that I'm comparing you to a vampire or anything. But it IS similar, isn't it.) <BR/>Love you!<BR/>P.S. Do you believe in vampires?you guys r sillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02017472293325625854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-36941124841299583252007-06-13T11:26:00.000-07:002007-06-13T11:26:00.000-07:00Who is Nancy Grace?&:o?Who is Nancy Grace?<BR/>&:o?you guys r sillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02017472293325625854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-75137160381548603682007-06-13T10:57:00.000-07:002007-06-13T10:57:00.000-07:00Ninja, please...Let's put this in perspective. Is ...Ninja, please...<BR/>Let's put this in perspective. Is Trudy even hot? You're Jesus for Your Sakes! Can't you get any chick you want? Why does it have to be Trudy? I think you need to focus on this Friday and your appointment with your Dad. I left you a little package under the 3rd pew on the left side at St. Anthony's. Your Dad will love it. Forget my suggestion to share some with Trudy before a steak dinner. Keep it for yourself and maybe a little 2nd hand for Karen(your pet lamb). I bet she'll really gambol then. You'll trip watching her. How fun is that?<BR/>Patch up this S-word with your old man. You'll sleep better at night.<BR/>He'll get Damien off your back and the whole love life business will eventually fall into place. <BR/>I love my Friend Jen(biggest head i've ever seen) but I'd rather have a cold sore than hang with Nancy Grace. I'll discuss that with her. I do want to thank you for helping her find her lipgloss though, it changed her life.<BR/>Her dog had a seizure yesterday and she was supposed to shoot liquid valium up his b-word(PMF). She missed and got it in her face and she was real upset. Are you able to heal sick animals? Mr. J,that's the dog not you, needs your help, or Big headed Jen does to be a better aim with the liquid valium. Oh, BTW Jen, if I had a seizure in your presence, would you shoot the valium up my bum?<BR/>It could happen, I'm just saying....<BR/>Alright my Ninja,<BR/>it'll all work out. Stay positive.<BR/>Your friend (and connection)<BR/>Burrito(roll the r's) MartinezBurrito Martinezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04146530621688605810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-77625635877419816882007-06-13T10:46:00.000-07:002007-06-13T10:46:00.000-07:00Some people have asked about your mum, Jesus, but ...Some people have asked about your mum, Jesus, but I'm thinking that a better person to talk to right now would be your stepdad.<BR/><BR/>Joseph's always struck me as a pretty sound guy, what with the carpentry and everything, and I really think you need a man's perspective on all this.<BR/><BR/>Plus, he's not exactly a stranger to affairs of the heart. (I don't want to speak out of a turn here, but I'm guessing your dad wasn't exactly great with the child support payments.)<BR/><BR/>I say give Joseph a call. Hang out for a while. You know. Sometimes a man-to-man chat is exactly what you need.GeorgyGirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15357648830027648906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-75284427614512031302007-06-13T10:28:00.000-07:002007-06-13T10:28:00.000-07:00It's OK not to feel better, Jesus. Sometimes the f...It's OK not to feel better, Jesus. Sometimes the full impact of our ignorance makes feeling better an impossibility for a long time. But that's OK. We're all ignorant and that includes Trudy. When she comes to her senses about Damien she'll be biting the wall for being a complete douche (PMF). Damien? Well, some people never get to know just how ignorant they are. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for sharing your whole life with us Jesus. You really give it all up for us, don't you?Choirboyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06186636266958242815noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-10339842566695550382007-06-13T10:19:00.000-07:002007-06-13T10:19:00.000-07:00Hi Jeebus(remember that from the Simpsons? Hehe) I...Hi Jeebus(remember that from the Simpsons? Hehe)<BR/> I think Trudy is too high maintenance(sp). She is making you jump through hoops for mere crumbs of satisfaction. If she is gonna put you through hell(PMF) just for a lunch date, what is she gonna make you do for "anything else"? No Jeebus, find yourself a nice natural girl, maybe a shephardess and relax. Of course if you don't try and make a go of it with her, you'll never know for sure. You know what, date her and a shephardess. No reason you have to be tied down to one girl at your age.Mike Nogahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08734145609031833065noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-45442347989956588982007-06-13T09:05:00.000-07:002007-06-13T09:05:00.000-07:00So what's up with that? Don't you have the ability...So what's up with that? Don't you have the ability to know the hearts and thoughts of mankind?<BR/><BR/>Or was that just one of the Apostles exaggerating that time you did that cool party "mind reading" trick at John the Baptist's (that's your cousin) birthday party?The Ichthyophilehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03286848300627291629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-57432711626257836812007-06-13T08:24:00.000-07:002007-06-13T08:24:00.000-07:00Dude, you know what, you just need to turn that fr...Dude, you know what, you just need to turn that frown upside down...<BR/>Whenever I feel down I like to listen to some Jonathan Richman, you know, the dude from the Modern Lovers...<BR/>Watch <A HREF="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AswoDY7N38" REL="nofollow">this here</A> (linky rhymes with flinky) and you will feel better, I gaurantee it... <BR/>Maybe instead of a mix tape you can make a video of yourself dancing and being happy... Somewhere along the line I think I learned that girls don't dig pouters... although they do dig surly, go figure... <BR/>Funny, being a Buddhist you should remember the 4 noble truths and consider that you brought this all on yourself...<BR/>1) Life is suffering<BR/>2) Recognize, my ninja<BR/>3) Stop it!!!<BR/>4) Do something about it<BR/>Love (in a purely platonic fashion)<BR/>Catfish<BR/>(none givens old man)Catfishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01010910766196425457noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-40204484623103618272007-06-13T07:22:00.000-07:002007-06-13T07:22:00.000-07:00Jesus,Just give it time! Lunch next week sounds li...Jesus,<BR/><BR/>Just give it time! Lunch next week sounds like a good first step. Maybe you will start feeling better about all this soon.<BR/><BR/>In the meantime, be sure to spend lots of quality time with Karen. Did you know that studies show that the time we spend with our pets decreases our stress? It's true!<BR/><BR/>Maybe you and Karen could dress up in matching Ninja outfits. Then you could take a photo and send it to Trudy, which would probably make her laugh and remember all the reasons why she like-likes you.Rebeccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11931323707488046760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-39193858830888513302007-06-13T05:51:00.000-07:002007-06-13T05:51:00.000-07:00brian bailey:My own daughter is a Sarah with an H,...brian bailey:<BR/>My own daughter is a Sarah with an H, so I completely know what you're talking about --- that H or NOT that H is *really* important to Sarahs! (and Saras!)<BR/>Thanks for bringing that to people's attention, dude!you guys r sillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02017472293325625854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-70052223566740398262007-06-13T05:39:00.000-07:002007-06-13T05:39:00.000-07:00poor sweet jesus:I agree with YGRS - I think Trudy...poor sweet jesus:<BR/><BR/>I agree with YGRS - I think Trudy is effing (PMF?) with you.. <BR/><BR/>this hurts my heart.<BR/><BR/>I like the idea about advice from Dan Savage too.. he would probably tell you to drop er if she's effin' with you....<BR/><BR/>lets take a tire iron to Damien's knee cap.killedasouthernbellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13088292217926156011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-14463777460973024032007-06-13T05:30:00.000-07:002007-06-13T05:30:00.000-07:00trina:eeek! --- bad advice, woman. Remember the EN...trina:<BR/>eeek! --- bad advice, woman. Remember the END of Wonder Years? Kevin and Winnie TOTALLY did NOT end up together AT ALL . . . PLUS Kevin's dad DIED. --- We do NOT want our ninja Jesus to go that way, do we?!<BR/>O, I hate how Trudy made you grovel, Jesus.<BR/>Am I the only one here who's thinking that mayhaps (THAT's an Olde Timey word too!) Jesus should just DROP Trudy (she works at the bank) because she seems like she seriously might like Damien MORE than Jesus fer reals now - or if NOT, she's just effing ( pardon my French ) around with Jesus and doesn't deserve him ANYWAY ??? (I'm sure he could do better!)<BR/>Jesus, I think you can do much better than Trudy, dude. Trudy's seeming like waaaay too much work now...you guys r sillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02017472293325625854noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-21970193640464585492007-06-13T05:21:00.000-07:002007-06-13T05:21:00.000-07:00i've told you, dude. you need to build a time mach...i've told you, dude. you need to build a time machine and go back so damien never stole second base or trudy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-84068119838194931042007-06-13T02:36:00.000-07:002007-06-13T02:36:00.000-07:00I remember a while ago you plugged Dan Savage and ...I remember a while ago you plugged Dan Savage and his column, have you asked his advice? I know he's a little risque, but c'mon, he's a clever fella.<BR/><BR/>And if that doesn't help you, I recommend a little film called Chasing Amy. It might give you some perspective.Stacy&Jayehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11659223011949458260noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-20152953011707302462007-06-13T00:45:00.000-07:002007-06-13T00:45:00.000-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Stacy&Jayehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11659223011949458260noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-12122776167788647792007-06-12T22:50:00.000-07:002007-06-12T22:50:00.000-07:00My Ninja Jeez,Sounds like the Trudy (she works at ...My Ninja Jeez,<BR/>Sounds like the Trudy (she works at a bank) is trying to make you jealous. Since she does like you she is also messing with Damien's brain too. Of course Damien is an ass (PMF) so let's not be concerned about him. Just continue to be nice and friendly and leave it at that for now. I'm thinking the Nancy Grace thing might work. She has great hair, mine's so lifeless and dull and hers is so out-there and big. (Sigh).....Sorry, anyway, go out and date Nancy Grace, and mix yourself a tape. The "Footloose" soundtrack is a good start. I loved that movie, didn't you??? Did Burrito drop off your "package"?????minniemama68https://www.blogger.com/profile/01400210964965229219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-79650162743369039252007-06-12T22:34:00.000-07:002007-06-12T22:34:00.000-07:00Oh, one other thing Jesus (hay-soos)....Thanks for...Oh, one other thing Jesus (hay-soos)....<BR/><BR/>Thanks for helping me find my Tinkerbell lip gloss in the glove compartment of the VW when I was 6. That made be believe in you forever. Remember? Oh, also, what type of seat do you have on your bike? Banana or regular?<BR/><BR/>Does Trudy text very much. If so I think I have an idea for you.....Big Headed Jen - friend of Burrito Martinezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07513998706360834872noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-13411269932211991692007-06-12T22:31:00.000-07:002007-06-12T22:31:00.000-07:00Buenos tardes, Jesus (Hay-Soos),I'm not sure what ...Buenos tardes, Jesus (Hay-Soos),<BR/><BR/>I'm not sure what to make of all this... I can't believe Trudy (works at the bank) made you grovel with an extended apology and then toss Damien back in your face. I think you should make her jealous with another cutie pie.<BR/>My big head is propped up on some pillows but it's cutting of the blood flow to my ears and tongue so I have to make this fast. You should show off with Nancy Grace in front of Trudy (works at the bank). She's kind of being a b-word (PMF) to you now.<BR/><BR/>Make her jealous by showing off around town with Nancy Grace. That will show her. <BR/><BR/>Yoikes! I posted this on the wrong day but now it's on the right day.Big Headed Jen - friend of Burrito Martinezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07513998706360834872noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9105555073692111393.post-16574990268734064652007-06-12T21:16:00.000-07:002007-06-12T21:16:00.000-07:00Yes, this sounds familiar.I remember one time in h...Yes, this sounds familiar.<BR/>I remember one time in high school, this guy asked me to the prom and I thought it was because we were just, like, friend-friends. I thought that there was no way he could have like-liked me, because he was way out of my league (Student Body President, and all that)...anyway we ended up not going to the prom because I missed all of his "signals" and he called the whole thing off. (Which really didn't matter in the long run because I married Catfish, which is way better than that prom guy.)<BR/>Jesus, do you think Trudy is out of your league? Because, Good News: she digs you, i.e., she's totally in your league (I like the softball metaphor) and someday, you will get to know her in the biblical sense. <BR/>Does this make me a prophet?<BR/>Love,<BR/>Paula<BR/>(None Given)Paulahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09753472327758672034noreply@blogger.com